A Closer Look at Revenge Procrastination
By: Alexandra DeWoskin, LCSW
I need to give credit to one of my clients for this one. I pride myself in knowing most things psychology. But I didn’t know there was a name for this. I honestly just thought it was a “me thing.”
I work long hours as a therapist in Chicago with little downtime between appointments. When I finish working, usually later in the evening, I start my nightly leisure time and most often stay up way past a reasonable bedtime.
It’s my “me time” when I read, watch tv, listen to music, or play with the dog. It feels like if I put off going to sleep, I’m putting off waking up in the morning (I’m also not a morning person). Makes sense, right? Well, no it doesn’t make sense because while it feels good in the moment, the mornings are rough due to loss of sleep. One of my clients was talking about a similar habit and called it “revenge procrastination”.
Revenge bedtime procrastination or sleep procrastination refers to a phenomenon in which people put off going to bed to engage in activities that they don’t have time for during the day. It is a way of finding time for leisure and entertainment at the expense of sleep. You get “revenge” for your busy daytime schedule, with little or no free time, by fitting in leisure time at the expense of sleep. Three key features define sleep procrastination:
- The delay in going to sleep must decrease overall sleep time per night.
- This delay in going to sleep is not due to any other reason, such as being sick or an something interfering with sleep.
- People who engage in the behavior are fully aware that it may lead to negative consequences, but they choose to engage in it anyways.
Revenge bedtime procrastination is all about cherishing free or personal time when you really feel you have a lack of it. It’s the decision to sacrifice sleep for leisure time that is driven by a daily schedule lacking in free time. For parents of young children, those hours after putting the kids to bed might be the only time they have alone to focus on what they want to do.
Related: How to not procrastinate
For people with hectic work schedules, lounging on the couch and binge-watching TV shows might be the only time to experience unstructured relaxation. For some they may try to catch up on hobbies or engage in more energy-intensive activities. But, for most people, these activities tend to focus on things that don’t require a great deal of effort and recovery time in response to stress.
Revenge sleep procrastination is mainly about control. When we don’t feel like we can control what happens during the daytime, we fight the feeling of disempowerment by doing whatever we can to take control of our night hours. The desire for freedom and control of your day is totally valid, but it’s not sleep that should be punished for what goes on in the daylight hours. We can call this revenge daytime procrastination.
Sleep procrastination can take different forms. One form involves delaying the act of getting into bed. Another is delaying the time of trying to fall asleep once in bed, a problem that has been associated with rising rates of electronic device use in bed. For some people, sleep procrastination may result from identifying more as a night person or night owl who are forced to try to adapt to schedules designed for morning people or early risers. Bedtime procrastinators may procrastinate in other areas of their lives, but not always.
In the long term, this choice to put off sleep can turn into actual insomnia, where you can’t fall asleep. If this is something you do routinely, your body and your brain are going to start to learn this habit. And it starts to lose the association between bed and sleep especially if your leisure activities are done in bed. The difference between sleep procrastination and insomnia is choice. With revenge bedtime procrastination, you are reclaiming the hours of your life you feel like you lost during the day on purpose.
Staying up late on occasion won’t have a major impact on your sleep schedule, health, or overall well-being. The problem is when revenge bedtime procrastination becomes a regular habit. Although revenge bedtime procrastination can be tempting in the moment, late nights followed by early mornings can directly lead to serious sleep deprivation. Cutting back on sleep can have significant negative effects on mental, physical, and emotional health with short and long-term consequences. Without enough hours of sleep, the mind and body can’t properly recharge, which can have widespread negative effects on health. The consequences of sleep loss can arise quickly or build up over time. Adults need 7-9 hours of sleep a night and children need more.
Negative effects of sleep deprivation caused by revenge bedtime procrastination can potentially include:
- Anxiety, depression, irritability
- Difficulty regulating emotions and impulse control
- Difficulty concentrating
- High blood pressure
- Increased risk of cardiac problems
- Diabetes
- Weakened immunity
- Hormone-related problems
- Weight gain
- Worse memory
- Slower thinking
- Less attention
- Faulty decision making
- Daytime sleepiness
- Lower productivity
- Distracted or drowsy driving
If revenge bedtime procrastination is a problem for you, prioritize sleep, remind yourself why getting to bed on time is important. If you feel more rested the next day, you’re more likely to have the energy to get through the tasks you need to accomplish. Having a nighttime routine can reduce the impulse to stay up later instead of going to bed.
Developing healthy sleep hygiene, involves creating good sleep habits and an environment conducive to sleep. Remember that it will take more than one night’s sleep to truly get into good sleep habits. Relaxation methods, such as reading a book, meditating, or gently stretching, can be part of your bedtime routine and help ease you into sleep. Relaxation techniques may also decrease the stress that can drive revenge bedtime procrastination. Practicing good sleep habits including include:
- Keep a consistent bedtime and wake-up time, including on non-working days.
- Avoid alcohol or caffeine or sugar late in the afternoon or evening.
- Stop the use of electronic devices, including cell phones and tablets, for at least half-an-hour before bed.
- Develop a stable routine to use every night to prepare for bed. For instance, you could brush your teeth, read a book, and do some gentle stretches. Whatever you choose, follow the same routine each night.
- Create an inviting bedroom environment that is dark, cool, quiet and has a comfortable mattress and bedding.
- Power down devices that have a screen and if you use a clock with a display, turn it away from you.
- Consider using a white-noise app/machine or other soothing sounds to mask any disruptive noises.
- Limit daytime naps.If you must, keep it to 30 minutes or less earlier in the day.
- Skip big late-night meals. Eating a lot before you bed can make you restless.
- Limit your water intake a couple hours before bed to avoid middle-of-the night bathroom breaks.
- Wake up and go to bed at the same times every day, even on weekends.
- Start your nighttime routine earlier. Set a reminder for an hour before you would normally begin getting ready for bed. Give yourself this extra time to wind down from the day and slow your pace.
Revenge bedtime procrastination can be a tough habit to break. Because the behavior is ultimately motivated by feeling that you don’t have control over your time during the day, reassessing how you spend your time each day is often the first step toward overcoming bedtime procrastination. Since a busy schedule is often at the root of revenge bedtime procrastination, take a hard look at your daily demands.
Cut out the things that aren’t important or necessary, make you unhappy, or are unfulfilling. You’re less likely to feel the need to avenge your loss of time if you don’t feel resentful of losing those precious hours of your day. Schedule time for yourself. Focus on replacing those unwanted activities you’ve cut with time to indulge in some of the things that you love. Prioritize “alone time” as you would anything else. Schedule blocks of time for yourself.
Sleep is vital to mental and physical health and wellbeing. If you find that your sleep problems are ongoing or causing notable daytime sleepiness, you can talk with a doctor who can review your sleep habits and symptoms to determine if you are affected by a sleep disorder. But, revenge bedtime procrastination, while not a psychological disorder, can have its roots in general procrastination, unhappiness with your life situation, or struggles with coping skills. These are all things a therapist can help with.
A therapist can help you learn the skills you need to examine the source of your stress and how to handle it in a healthy way. They can help you create healthy sleep hygiene, including a nighttime wind-down routine, healthy diet and exercise, treatment for insomnia and other sleep disorders.
